In our society today, some couples enjoy their marriages to the fullest for a long time, in fact till death do them apart. However, for some other couples, their marriages last but for a little period before crashing and ending in divorce.
But the truth is that divorce is nothing but an easy way out of a troubled marriage, even though it is not the best option. In reality, some divorced couples later regretted their actions when they realized that what caused their divorce or crashed their marriages would have been fixed.
Of a truth, it pains me whenever I read about any failed marriage and the minor issues that caused such marriages to fail. Such issues would have been fixed.
One of the major causes of crashes of marriages or marriage breakdowns is infidelity. The reason is that infidelity is often seen as a great betrayal of trust, therefore, poisons the love among couples and causes the love to get soured.
As a result, whenever love gets divided, before long the couple’s love for each other gets soured. The causes of infidelity is another topic of discussion for another period.
It is when any of the couples begin to get involved in extramarital affairs, that he or she may begin to compare his husband/wife to another man or woman.
But when their marriage eventually gets crashed, it is then that they realize that the man or woman they divorced was far better than their present man or woman, and that leads them to regret it.
As infidelity is one of the major causes of crashes of marriages, the solution, therefore, is for couples to ensure that they never get involved at all. If any of the couples ever get involved, the person should repent wholeheartedly and seek the forgiveness of his or her spouse.
Sincere repentance and as well as sincere forgiveness are what ensure that the marriage is not crashed. Moreover, couples should remember their marriage vow and vow never to allow another man or woman to see their pant or nakedness except for their male or female doctors.
In addition, I have never heard of couples whose love for each other is blossoming that went for divorce. Therefore, couples should do everything necessary to rekindle their love for each other.
As Love is the bedrock of every true and exciting marriage, couples will agree with me, that when their love is blossoming, they will never contemplate divorce. The main reason for contemplating a divorce is that or when love for each other had soured.
When love gets soured among couples, other negative issues will begin to follow. So couples concerned should ensure that they don’t allow anything to happen to their first love.
Couples never get up one day to observe that their love for each other had gotten soured, this is because it takes a long time before love gets soured. Anything that is alive keeps growing, so if a couple’s love for each other is not growing, they should do something about it before it gets soured.
Moreover, couples who are sincere to see that their love for each other is blossoming should always form the habit of sitting together and critically looking at any issue that could cause or bring conflicts between them.
Such conflict may be a result of things that any of the couples are doing that is hurting the other partner. Once couples always learn to tolerate each other, there will never be a prolonged conflict between them.
Above all, couples should ensure that have the interest of their marriage and spouse at heart in any of their action or reaction. The good things that any of the couples Is doing that the other spouse cherishes, he/she should keep to it.
Furthermore, couples should always learn to sit down together and analyze the situation of their marriage and what could cause or is causing the conflict.
The problem with some couples is that they are not open to one another because they are not intimate. Couples should always take time to build intimacy with each other and that will enable them to be open to each other.
Talking about intimacy, this will better take place when couples focus more on the good actions or character of their spouses rather than on their bad character.
In reality, I practice this a lot myself. Whenever the devil points out to me one thing that my wife is doing that is not good, I point out to him three to five things she is doing that I cherish.
However, couples who are sincere with each other should learn to start working on those things their partners don’t like about their character or things he or she is doing that is hurting him or her.
Above all, couples should learn to practice forgiveness. Again, one of the reasons why some marriages end up in divorce is because one or both parties have the spirit of unforgiveness or refuse to forgive each other wrongdoings.
Love among couples blossoms more when couples learn to practice forgiveness all the time, as their marriage will surely make a turnaround. What is that thing that your partner did to you that is hurting you deeply? Learn to forgive him or her sincerely from the depth of your heart.
Often, I always advise couples that they should change the way they react to issues: If, for instance, you observe certain things that your spouse is doing that are hurting you, it will do you well if you change the way you react to those things.
Once you succeed to change your reactions to those things, it will no longer hurt you, and you may not even know when your spouse stops doing those things.
Finally, couples should learn or get committed more to their marriage and each other. One problem with couples is that they are not committed to their marriages.
Once couples were able to get more committed to their marriage and each other, it will surely make their marriages take a positive turn around. Shalom!