In this life, if you look at some gardens, you will so much admire them because such gardens are well watered and taken care of. However, for some other gardens, they are overgrown with weeds that the sites look ugly.
The same is true of some marriages; some marriages are like that well-watered garden while some are not.
So for your marriages to be like that well-watered garden, you must attend or work on your marriage for it to work.
You must pay the necessary prize by implementing certain principles that make for a successful marriage. That is why it is said, “Work on your marriage if you want to see your marriage work.”
Most a time, we see some couples enjoying their marriages and each other to the fullness and we admire and cherish them, but the opposite is seen in our own marriage.
The reason is that some worked on their marriage by paying the necessary prize and that is why they are enjoying the fruits of their labor.
It is said, “The way you make your bed is the way you will lay on it”. Your marriage is good or sweet as you make it.
Some couples, because of the negative things they are seeing in their marriage, they accuse each other of being responsible. They point accusing fingers at each other of being responsible.
Some even say many bad things about their spouse even calling him or her a witch or wizard, some think that marrying that man or the woman was a mistake. It is not so, your marriage was not a mistake, but you are the mistake.
To this end, if you will diligently follow these simple steps, you will see that you will launch your marriage into a positive new dimension and next level.
In the first instance, you should reflect back and answer this question “why did I choose that woman as my wife or why did I accept that man as my husband”?
I strongly believe that the main reason was that you loved him or her. So the question then is “what happened to that love, is that love increasing or declining and why”?
So for you to launch your marriage to the next level, you must necessarily answer the love issue and take practical steps to really ensure that the love for each other is intact and growing if you desire to move your marriage to the next level.
The following are the practical check as to prove your commitment and love for each other, it is necessary that both of you should sit down together and ponder and sincerely ask and answer the following questions?
The first question couples need to ask us to confirm what is the strength of their love and commitment to their marriage and for each other? Couples need to confirm that they sincerely love and are committed to each other?
If both couples will resolve to sincerely love each other more and get more committed to their marriage and to each other, they will see that their marriage is launched to the new level.
Secondly, couples should ask themselves to what extent are they taking care of the welfare needs of each other? To you in particular, when last did you buy things like a present for each other? Particularly as a man, to what extent are you grooming your bride?
You will recall that you are called a bridegroom when you matched to the altar, meaning that you are expected to groom your bride. So to what extent are you doing that?
The third question couples need to ask themselves is to what extent are they taking care of the sexual needs of each other? Are they enjoying their sex life to the fullness or are they not starving each other of sex?
Couples should resolve to satisfy each other sexually at all times without attaching any condition and never at any time or reason starve each other of sex.
The fourth question is to ask themselves “to what extent are they intimate or building intimacy with each other? You see, love for each other will start to decline when couples no longer have time for each other.
It is obvious when couples resolve and start to build stronger intimacy with each other, you will surely see that their marriage relationship will take a positive turn around and move to the next level.
The fifth question is to ask themselves “to what extent do they accept when they are wrong as well as apologize and forgive each other when they are wrong?
Both of them should learn to accept when they are wrong and say “I am sorry from their heart” and as well learn to forgive and forget when their spouse says “I am sorry”.
Sixthly, to what extent do you trust each other? The problem with some couples is that they don’t trust each other so both of you should resolve and start building a strong trust for each other and resolve not to betray the trust for each other.
One of the reasons why some marriages crashed is because couples don’t trust each other and do things with reckless abandon without minding how their partner feels about them.
Finally, deal ruthlessly with selfishness. Selfishness is a sure sign that you don’t have a strong love and trust each other. Once couples start to use the phrase “irreconcilable differences”,
it is a sure sign that selfishness has taken root in their marriage relationship and must be dealt with ruthlessly if that marriage must survive.
Couples who love and trust each other do most a time compromise their stand just to please each other.
Couples who love each other and are not selfish don’t insist on having their way. So to insist on having your way is a sign of selfishness.
The above seven points are very simple marriage principles but will surely launch your marriage to a greater height and next level if you and your spouse will diligently implement them. See you and your spouse move to the next level in your marriage. Shalom.