In our society today, marriage failures are on the increase every day as many marriages are ending in divorce. In other words, the rates of divorce are on the high side because couples don’t know the secrets that help to build strong foundations for their marriage.
The reason for the above is so is that couples fail to understand that getting married is not the ultimate, but what happened after. Couples necessarily need to do something to sustain their marriage, as they have entered a big institution called a marriage institution.
It is said that marriage is an institution and those outside are craving to enter while those that are inside is craving to get out. In this institution, some are enjoying their marriage while some are enduring their marriage.
To this end, couples need to pay attention to what they do in their marriage after they got married. If couples will put up to 70% of what they did to get the man/woman to marry them, their marriage will surely be a good success.
In other words, couples must necessarily need to do some things as to sustain their marriage if it is to succeed. So I will be sharing here secrets which couples who wish to enjoy their married life instead of enduring it should do.
The point is that many marriages are collapsing today simply due to ignorance, ignorance in the sense that some couples fail to understand the secrets of what it takes for a sustained marriage. They fail to know secrets that help build strong foundations for their marriage.
SECRETS DIRECTED TOWARD THE WOMEN
As a married woman, if you wish to sustain your marriage, a marriage in which there are harmony and love flows freely. The first secret then is that you should “You should know those things that attracted you to the man in the first place and build upon those things”.
It may be your shape or structure, it may be the way you dress, it may be the way you always comport yourself, and it may even be your character or even your smile. So whatever be the content of the package in you that attracted you to him, you should build those things.
When I said those things, it means that it may be more than one thing that attracted you to the man in the first place. Some may say that they sincerely don’t know those things. I wish to say that you do.
The only reason is that you failed to pick it, or you have not been paying attention, as the man may be saying that before you people got married. Those comments as “I like the way you smile”, “I like the way you dress”, “I like your hairdo”, “I like your cooking” etc.
All such comments indicate what attracts you to him. Whatever be the case, know those things and strive to build upon them, to build upon them means to improve upon them.
What if sincerely you don’t know those things? Then I suggest that you indirectly ask him jokingly. You should ask him to tell you the things that he likes about you that attracted you to him in the first place?
Moreover, you should equally carry out a direct and indirect investigation of what the man likes about you. Not only those things that attracted you to him, but those things he likes about you presently and tries to build or improve on those things.
When you do that, you will observe that his love for you will continue to increase day by day. That is, your love and marriage will ever be successful and exciting.
SECRETS DIRECTED TOWARD THE MEN
Also, as a man, what are those things that attracted the lady to you in the first place, or what are those things you like most about her presently? You need to be confessing those things to her as it will help her to start building upon those things.
You should as well do everything to maintain those things. The problem with most men is that they are ignorant of how to maintain their wives. Don’t ever neglect or fail to maintain those things you saw in her that attracted her to you if you want to see her ever-blossoming.
SECRETS DIRECTED TOWARD BOTH COUPLES
Love among couples does sourer like a man no longer sees those things he saw in the woman that attracted her to him. The fault is on both couples, the woman failed to build or improve on those things that attracted her to the man. And the man failed to maintain those things that he saw in the woman that attracted her to him.
For their marriage to thrive, couples must be ready and willing to pay a prize, as there is no marriage institution on earth that does not thrive on sacrifice. That is to say, either or both parties must be ready and willing to pay a prize, and the prize may be in the form of sacrifice. If you are not ready or willing to sacrifice something, your marriage may not last.
If you try to interview couples whose marriages had collapsed, you will surely notice accusations and counter-accusation, either from one or both parties.
Very important, both couples should avoid focusing on the negatives of their spouse. One of the major reasons why love between couples gets sour is because instead of focusing on the good qualities of their spouse, they chose to dwell on their negatives.
By so doing, the negatives swallow the positives. Couples need to realize that they equally have faults themselves, and that is the very reason why they should overlook the faults or weaknesses of their spouse.
Once you keep reacting negatively to the fault or weakness of your spouse, your marriage would surely fail, or you live miserably in that marriage. Rather, you should acknowledge the weakness or faults of your partner, but decide to ignore or overlook them and find a way to help him or her overcome these weaknesses.
End of part one, watch out for part two. Shalom!