This is the second part of the series, “towards building a better and successful marriage”. We looked at taking responsibility to work on your marriage for your marriage to work.
In this part two, we shall be looking at issues that couples should be avoided in their marriage in order to prevent a crack or a crash in their marriage. So to avoid a crack or crash of our marriage, the following issues should be avoided diligently:
Avoid comparing your spouse or marriage with another: If we don’t want to see a crack in our marriage, we should never begin to compare our wife or husband with other men or ladies in town.
In fact, you should not even compare what is happening in another marriage with that of your own marriage.(not that you can’t learn from what is happening in other marriages)
I said this because some couples borrow what they see happening in another marriage and expect to see such to happen exactly the way in their own marriage.
This should never happen because of personality differences, and no two marriages are exactly the same. The way you relate to each other is a result of who you are and the personality of your spouse.
So relating to him/her on whom you expect him/her to be rather than on whom he/she actually really is will surely bring conflicts in your marriages. Moreover, your love for each will surely drop the moment you begin to compare your spouse with another.
Yes, you will see other wealthy men in town, men far wealthier than your husbands, but avoid comparing your husband with any other man. Also, you will surely see many other pretty women in town, but that should never make you begin to compare your wife with any other woman.
Secondly, You should totally avoid denying $ex to your spouse: We should realize that what had crashed and is still crashing marriages is infidelity. So you should consider that some couples contribute directly or indirectly to their wives or husbands getting involved with other men or women. So you should totally avoid denying $ex to your spouse.
Most of the couples don’t satisfy each other $exually and some frequently deny each other $ex. As a result, they end up forcing their partners to seek sexual satisfaction elsewhere.
Also, there are men who because their wives keep denying or starving them $ex, in the process of seeking satisfaction outside, fell in love with another woman. So if you don’t want to lose your husband/wife, try to satisfy him/her $exually.
Again, we should avoid and settle quickly any form of quarrel with our spouse: Another way you really work on your marriage is by creating a very good and peaceful atmosphere in your home. You do so by avoiding things that bring conflicts and quarrel. Of a truth, some women are tigers at home.
So the only way the men of the house could survive in their marriage is by becoming lions. That is why some homes are full of tension because lions and tigers are in the house.
Regarding the peaceful atmosphere at home, women have a greater role to play because it is women who chart the part each home should take. Even the Bible has many things to say regarding creating a good peaceful atmosphere at home.
See Proverbs 14:1 which says, “The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish pulls it down with her hands”; Also, Proverbs 17:1 equally says, “Better is a dry morsel with quietness than a house full of feasting with strife.”;
Also, look at what Proverbs 25:24 says, “It is better to dwell in a corner of a housetop, than in a house shared with a contentious woman.”. A woman who plays her role very well at home, that home will surely enjoy peace and tranquility. So you do well by being a lamb at home rather than being a tiger.
Also, one other way you work on your family is by being obedient to the Biblical injunction to be Submissive to your husband. As a woman, you gain a lot by being submissive to your husband rather than being confrontational.
When a woman is confrontational, a lot of thing goes wrong, including constant quarrel. As a man, if you fail to heed the BIBLICAL Injunction to love and cherish your wife, you will never build a successful marriage.
It is when your love for your wife is at its lowest ebb that you could raise your hand to beat your wife. Until I come your way again, we should stay committed to our marriage and try to avoid anything that could crash your marriage. Our marriage is as good or bad as we make it. Shalom!.