In our society today, the heart’s desire of us all is the dream and desire to marry the man or woman of our heart and to enjoy a sweet and exciting marriage at the end.
That is to say, while we were growing up and ever before we got married, we were all dreaming or desiring of having a husband or wife that will always make us happy in our marriage.
However, after some got married and their expectations/dreams of getting married came true. However, their dream and desire of having a happy marriage become a mirage as what many are seeing in their marriages is quite a direct opposite or the reverse of what they expected, desired or dreamed of.
Many couples who are not enjoying a happy or exciting marriage may be thinking or asking themselves ‘what actually could have gone wrong as to the reason they are not enjoying a happy marriage as they desired or expected
Some couples end up pointing accusing fingers at their spouse as being the cause, especially couples whose marriages are in crisis or have failed. Obviously, some couples may be thinking that the reason that they made a mistake is the choice of the man or woman they married.
The truth of the matter is that couples who are not having a happy and exciting marriage are because they lack the knowledge and understanding of what it takes to enjoy a happy and exciting marriage.
To enjoy a happy, exciting marriage is the sole responsibility of individual couples concerned. Couples must necessarily resolve to pay the price to ensure that all that is necessary to enjoy happy and exciting marriages are in place in their individual marriages.
However, the saying goes that in marriages, the way couples lay their bed is the way they will lay on it. To this end, the starting point to building and enjoying a happy and exciting marriage is to ensure that they have a very strong and solid marriage foundation for their marriages.
We will see marriage as a building, and the strength of any building is its foundations. It is after one has laid a strong and solid foundation for their marriage that they can gradually and patiently build on it.
What that entails is that before couples can start enjoying happy and exciting marriages they dreamed of or desired, they must ensure that they don’t have a faulty foundation for their marriages.
The problem with many marriages is that couples concerned are building their marriages on faulty marriage foundations. Other couples had solid foundations but failed in their responsibilities of building on the foundations.
For other couples, they are ignorantly destroying the solid marriage foundation themselves by introducing incompatible block materials to the foundations they have laid for their marriages.
To build a solid foundation, the first block used to lay a solid foundation is Love. Genuine love is the lubricant that lubricates any marriage that will succeed.
Some marriages collapsed soon after their marriages because of the absence of love. In other words, you must marry the person you love and who loves you if you expect your marriage to succeed.
Secondly, you must marry the person who you are proud of and who is equally proud of you. There are couples, who loved and are proud of the person they married, but the person didn’t love or be proud of them and there is no way one can enjoy a happy marriage in such a situation.
It is for that reason you see couples enduring their marriage instead of enjoying it because their partners are not committed to their marriages because they did not love or are proud of their spouse. In such a situation, one partner will be suffering in such marriages.
That is the situation when some ladies decide to marry men because of their wealth and not because such men love them. Or men who decided to marry ladies because of their physical beauty even though such ladies are not marriageable.
In addition, some couples are not enjoying their marriage because they don’t trust each other. One of the reasons is that when they were dating or courting, they told each other lots of lies, and after they got married, the truth began to unfold itself. In other words, they built the foundation of their marriage on lies.
As a result, they end up not trusting each other, and without trust; one can never enjoy happy and exciting marriage. The solution lies in letting the bye-gone be a bye-gone, in which the couples involved should start afresh, building trust in each other.
Such situations only become possible when the couples involved learn or endeavor and are conscious as to avoid betraying this trust for each other by avoiding suspicious lifestyles.
What about marrying the person you are, not, proud of? This is another faulty foundation that lots of couples built their marriages upon. That is the reason some couples are quick to divorce their partner at the slightest chance of meeting another person they are proud of.
Couples who got married to partners they are not proud of, there is a low-level commitment to their marriages and to that spouse, they are not proud of, and without commitment, one can never enjoy happy or exciting marriages.
In this situation, the solution lies in closing one’s eyes on the flaws or negatives about that person, but opening one’s eyes wide open as to take notice of some good peculiarities and qualities about that person.
By the time one is able to take notice of some nice and peculiar qualities, that person possesses more than the negatives about him or her, one will surely begin to be proud of him or her. Shalom!
